So the deal, that real deal, is that I am a girl. Yes, shocker. Lo an behold, I have to fucking admit it. Oop, and lookie here, I also am slightly anxious. Surprise, surprise.
So I took that Xanax and it kicked in fifteen minutes into a conversation.
And the advice was given that I'm sure I needed to hear. "Just be honest. Just have that important conversation". It was necessary. And here's why. Not because it was right, but because it was strong. No, I'm not going to follow it. I'm going to let it lie. I'm going to let things pass. Because really, honestly, truly, I do not want to waste any more time. At all. Nope. Not doing it.
Sure if a few weeks pass and there is no word, I might think about it again. But until then, there's this life I have, see? And there's a lot of people who care about me. And if I keep sitting and moping and panicking over gaddamn nothing (because believe me, it's always nothing) then I'm not going to move forward in anything.
So here's the answer, if anyone cares to know: there's no one I am going to put more energy into any longer. If they want me, they can come and find me, but until then, I am back to being the person I would like to be. Staying productive, improving myself, and succeeding with everything that is way more important than sex and/or flutter.
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